Hey Momma, I’m Jazmyne,
I’m a mother of five, wife and content creator. I’ve been with my husband for 12 years, married for 10. We met in Indianapolis, IN which is where most of our children were born. Then one day in 2016 (shortly after the New Year) I decided I wanted to move. I wanted or better yet, I needed a change of scenario. Where? California, somewhere we basically knew no one. Why? Because I was unhappy and desperately searching for a reason to live.
Yes I had my children and I loved them beyond comprehension but when dealing with PPD (I didn’t realize at the time that’s what was going on) the thoughts consume you. The negative takes over and it becomes all you can hear. Each day it gets louder and louder until everything else gets drowned out. So moving to California was my way of fighting back. It took me 5 years to figure that out, and Im still happy I did it.
I needed to try something new. I needed to go all in and do motherhood my way. Surrounded by “loving” friends and family I often felt judged, shamed and like everyone but me was dictating my motherhood. What others thought was always right. What they said I did, or at least tried my best to do anyway. What I saw on social media, I copied. I spent the first years of my motherhood journey miserable, self conscious and afraid to be the mother I wanted to be. Living in the shadows of other’s thoughts and opinions. This move is lit a flame in me. We were on our own. No more random visit from grandma to tell me how messy my house was. No more disapproving looks from siblings when my child cried “too” much. I was finally free. As scary as it was I embraced this journey and was finally able to own my motherhood. Becoming the mother I had always dreamt of
There were so many nights I scrolled social media hoping to feel some glimpse of encouragement. Looking for post or images that reflected my own life. I desperately wanted not to feel so alone. That day never came. All I saw where depictions of perfect moms, perfect husbands and even more perfect children. A life I knew nothing about.
So I decided to share my own story. I figured there had to be someone else out there who felt how I felt. Whose children hated matching, whose house always looked “lived in” and whose marriage had seen some better days. And that is how Not So Perfect Momma was born.
I’ve made it my mission to share my real life. My lived experiences along with any tips / tricks I’ve learned along the way. Motherhood is hard enough without having at least one person to look for for encouragement. There’s no reason any of us should feel lonely. None of us know what we’re doing, and the quicker we admit that the better off so many other mommas will be.